Absence
Inspiration... For so long I had been absent from my dreams, lost in a purgatory of sorts, wondering if anything I did mattered. Wondering if anyone listened. Yet I know I wouldn’t be writing if there weren’t those who listened. How foolish I was to ever hold that notion. Moving forward I have resolved myself to never make a mistake about why I write. I lied and said it was for me, so I could find balance in myself... Yet in balance there is different chaos, for me always wondering if playing safe is truly the right play. I find I favor staying true to who I am and what I’ve always dreamed, to speak my heart to open ears and make this world a better place. I’d rather have inspiration than balance. I’d rather pour my heart out to the world than pour my heart into finding my own peace. And yet in pouring out my heart I find that so much more than what I lost comes back and back and back again. Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me and supported my love. I write for you and only you, from now until forever.
Inspiration
I return to my workbench at last—
Like a retired smith back to his craft
After months of absence.
CRASH—
Like hammer on steel,
From hands stained in darkness
My ink splatters outward
As if from my veins,
Flowing passion from my heart
Onward, outward to the page.
I realized something,
Every time that I depart—
There are waiting, open eyes,
Those who hold my writing near
Inside their minds and under tongues,
In soulful tones I have endeared
To any that support my art,
For me this is a legacy.
For you this is a piece of me—
I had mistaken inspiration
As a magic I beget…
And in this failure understanding
I have toiled in regret...
I pondered on this hours yet,
I still don’t quite digest the truth
That I’ve been dry of motivation,
Energy to write to you—
For so long I have been mistaken
Thinking I would find my passion
Out in nature, in my patience
I thought I lost it, yet always had it—
In you—
My only inspiration.
Forgive me, I have kept you waiting.
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